If you’re lucky, as I am, in stressful times your mother proves to be calm and collected, even if she’s not always so. In difficult situations, my mother becomes my touchstone, showing me how I should work on myself in order to be a pillar for others.
With that in mind, I created some pillows for “adorable and amazing” mothers, a.k.a. moms extraordinaires. The qualities listed are as follows: Always loving, Best friend, Best listener, Supremely patient, Always supportive, Calm, Forgiving, Respectful.
Now, that’s a supremely high bar and your mom may not be up to it at all times. But it’s very important to recognize when mothers struggle to be the best they could be for their children. My mother is one such person. In the past, I used to get upset when she wasn’t the best friend or best listener, but I realized that in difficult times she makes up ten times over for when she couldn’t be all that I wanted her to be . . . because she was overburdened and tired! And yet when stressful times call for it, she always pulls resources from the depths of her mother’s heart and rises to the occasion.
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As she did today, when I was agitated on account of a headache that wouldn’t let up, a headache that started yesterday following a long period with a cold I couldn’t shake off. A mild cold, but very persistent. And then this headache. You may have read about that BBC journalist (or others) who had a headache for a few days and then she died of a stroke caused by a blood clot.
Well, I went today and got a Covid test, an antibody test, as well as a D-dimer test for evidence of dissolved blood clots, to rule out this worrisome possibility. Unlike other people in my life, my mother was supportive, and even though she had a headache herself (from her sinuses, she says), she didn’t belittle mine. Even though she wasn’t up to speed about this D-dimer test. But she trusted me to know what I needed to do, especially as I very rarely get headaches.
So anyway, here’s to wonderful mothers / mothers extraordinaires!
Note that you can personalize the qualities listed on the pillow. Also make sure you customize the back of the pillow with your mother’s name, the occasion, and the month and year.
Note that the above artsy pillow comes on several colorful backgrounds. You can choose your favored color on the Zazzle product page.
And here’s a pillow you can customize with two photos of you, your siblings, and your mother.
Since we’re on the topic of motherly qualities, I want to remark on patience. Even though my mother can be quite stubborn, she’s also patient. And because she often waits long and hard for me to come around to the way she does certain things, time and other experiences, including those involving me, shape her outlook, ultimately changing it. And in the end we find each other closer to one another, as we do when we try new recipes, for instance. These days for certain special occasions she wants salmon with garlic, lemon juice, and parsley, while I want honey-glazed orange and ginger salmon. I may not get her to use honey, especially as she heard me that honey becomes toxic when heated, but we may try, eventually, salmon with orange juice, ginger, and garlic.
Another quality I listed is “Always supportive.” Some people may not agree with you openly, but they may see your points about various things and actually be supportive of you. This is how it is with my mother. She rarely says “you were right” but she often calls me “smart” (a few times already this year—which is a lot!).
Then “Always loving.” Mothers have it hard. They had ideas about you all their life, and then you took off in life with your own ideas. Still, mothers like mine, while they still wish for certain things to be different, love you as a package and continue to be there for you, always in love of you—and trying to change a few things here and there if they can, if they may.
What about your mothers? What do you value more in their attitudes and behaviors?
To a happier, healthier life,